Smile Theory

I'm a thinker, and over the past year or so I have developed something I like to call Smile Theory. Let me explain it, and it's implications, to you all.

Much of my testimony includes bullying and it's personal and spiritual effect on me. Actually, because of the depression that bullying caused in my life, I experienced God in a way that RADICALLY changed my life. I now have the awesome privilege of calling the God of Wonders many things, such as Savior, Redeemer, Friend, and Father. And, ironically, a lot of my testimony includes smiling. The two - bullying and smiling - overlap over and over again. Let me explain.

Due to my experiences, I know firsthand how easy it is to don a smile. A smile can be worn by any face. However, smiles can be genuine or they can be counterfeited. The duplicity of smiles is confounding! Are the smile-wearers truly doing well on the inside, or are they covering the turmoil that simmers underneath the surface? After all, a smile displays on the outside the well-being on the inside... though sometimes misleadingly.

Smiles are donned for a variety of reasons, and many of them have nothing to do with happiness or joy. People wear smiles to fit in, to make potentially awkward situations comfortable, to flirt, to hide pain inside, or to ACTUALLY show the joy that wells up in their life. Smiles are fickle things, uncertain of their nature. With so many different motivations for putting on a smile, chances are you'll see them all around you, even if they have no business being on faces!

Something I've noticed as I've observed the people around me is their 'idle face'. Similar to the way a car idles and runs in the background during inactivity, emotions do the same thing. A genuinely happy person will smile when they are deep in thought or resting or riding a bus... times when they think they are not engaged in our world. Stressed people will furrow their brows when they idle, and tired people often close their eyes when they idle. It's just natural for our faces to display what we feel, and it happens when we stop fighting to display an image that isn't real.

This battle between displaying what others want to see and what you actually feel is one fought inside of everyone of us. A tired husband will put on a smile and refuse to show his exhaustion while greeting his kids as he walks in from work. And many times, putting on a fake smile is harmless. To keep others from stressing about your present condition is, I think, a noble thing to do! God for sure gives us strength to face the battles we encounter. We just need to know which battles we should face alone with God and which ones to fight with the Body of Christ.

So, while a smile does not always reflect our condition inside, it can still be beneficial to put one on. There is, however, a time when putting a smile on is very dangerous. That time is when you face immense emotional and spiritual strain and want to hide that pain behind closed doors.

Pain is the enemy of a smiler. It tears down and destroys all that a smile is! When people encounter pain, they respond a few different ways. They might flaunt their scars (which is selfish), shove their pain into a corner (which is destructive), fight their pain (which is useless), or give it to Jesus (which is the only true way to rid yourself of emotional pain and scars). People who hide their pain behind a smile are who I want to examine today.

Like I said, I was bullied a lot, so I can assure you that I felt pain and that I covered it all with a smile, so no one would know. Pain, when hidden in the dark, festers and grows and ravages the soul, only making us want to cover it with more smiles. Casting Crowns identifies and similar situation:

"Are we happy plastic people,
under shining plastic steeples?
With walls around our weakness,
and smiles to hide our pain?"

We need to tear down the walls around our weakness. We need to let go, and let God. But, more than that, we need accountability and community with other believers to keep us strong! Otherwise, we will continue to fail, or continue to feel pain.

Here's where Smile Theory has it's impact, and where it all points back to Jesus! I encourage you to break out of your comfort zone. I am a pretty goofy kid, and I say strange things to my friends just to elicit a smile or laugh! Think about it: many people smile, but it's just hiding their pain. If I can make someone smile or laugh, and GENUINELY smile or laugh, they will have forgotten their pain and distress, if only for a moment! That is a free sample of the joy and freedom they will experience if they come to know Christ personally! If their free sample comes at an expense to my personal dignity, I'll usually still do it; unless, of course, it goes against Jesus. I believe in the importance of actual smiling that much.

Get out there. You would be ASTOUNDED by how much pain exists in our plastic, happy communities. Make some people smile! Write a letter of encouragement, give a phone call, or offer prayer to someone. Tell a joke, share a funny story, or do a handstand! Giving smiles is easy, it's simple and cheap, and it means a lot more than a monetary donation. Anyone can give free samples of Jesus, because Jesus is found in grace, in love, in mercy, and in freedom from pain and weariness and stress. Wear a smile yourself, a GENUINE one, one that could only be found in the eternal hope placed deep in your soul by Jesus Christ! Give your distress to Jesus, then show others the way! And remember to use Smile Theory to help you #LiveItLikeJesus.