Relationship Advice from a Single Dude

I'm watching a potential relationship blossom between two of my good friends, and it's got me excited! And so, another dating related post.

If you haven't read it in my previous posts already, I have never once dated. It's something I look forward to, actually! I can't wait until Jesus blesses me with a young lady's hand to hold! Relationships are SO beautiful; I mean, just look at the relationship between us and Jesus! So much love and joy flow between two parties, and I CANNOT wait until I can emulate Jesus to one person in particular! I think about dating pretty frequently, and while I'm sure I don't know it all, I do know God has given me some insight into the matter as I observe the relationship between Him and I, and through reading Scripture. Both sources have helped me understand dating better.

I have a few plans in mind to help my future wife and I grow closer together, and we'll see if those hold up or not. But I won't share those cause if I'm wrong, well, I'm an inexperienced fool who just told yall the wrong things, and we don't want that!! But here is some advice that IS sound:

Be explicit. Okay, don't be explicitly sensual in public; there is a certain sacredness to having a relationship with another! Save that for special, alone moments. No need to kiss in front of others (unless yall are under the arbor being wed)! But what I mean is to be explicit in your intentions for the relationship. If something about your significant other bothers you, LET THEM KNOW. If you hold your discontentment inside, thinking you are giving them grace, beware: potentially, at least, you are stuck with them until one of you dies. Can you handle that annoyance or guilt for the rest of your life? Tell them to stop when they need to; it is so easy to get carried away when emotions go wild. Tell them how they can best show love to you, and keep them accountable to that! In this way, you guys will love each other in all the right ways and no hidden discontentment will exist between you two.

Pray for each other. Intercessory prayer is such a powerful tool, and I think having a relationship with someone else amplifies this effect! Because our earthly relationships reflect the one with our Jesus, it'll help us understand Jesus better! So, while we are praying TO the heavenly object of our affection, we are praying FOR our earthly object of affection! Not to take away from your significant other, but Jesus is pretty much the best thing to happen to us EVER. Keep it that way, and always be praying for each other.

Stay concerned with the things of Jesus. 1 Corinthians 7 warns us of marriage, because we'll become concerned with how to please our wife (or husband), rather than how we can please Jesus. Keep your focus on Him! Use your significant other as a crutch when you need it; don't make them the end goal! Fix your eyes on the beautiful face of your Savior. As soon as we take our eyes off Jesus, we are tempted easier. In fact, you will be tempted regardless of where your eyes are, but it is easy to rebuke the waves when your eyes are on Jesus! YOU have the power to give temptation dominion in your life; refuse to! You can overcome because JESUS ALREADY HAS! Claim His victory as your own, forget about temptation, and stay concerned with the things of Jesus.

Stay selfless. When you are starting a relationship, everything will be all rainbows and flower fields and it'll be great. But as time goes on, you'll see more and more that love isn't as much a pretty picture than it is a battle-ground. You must FIGHT to love the other, because some days, it'll be difficult. Love is a choice, and if you choose not to love, anger and resentment will take deep root. Just like our relationship with Jesus, it will take DAILY COMMITMENT to lay down your own wants and desires to fulfill those of your significant other. FIRST fulfill the hopes and dreams of Jesus, and THEN fulfill the hopes and dreams of your spouse! And please, don't do the same act of love over and over. Humans tire pretty quickly of repetition, so make sure you are finding new creative ways to love your significant other! Choose to love them creatively and whimsically, and be selfless.

Understand the gravity of a human heart. This one is INCREDIBLY important, and I would suggest you figure this out BEFORE dating. Don't take my word for it; figure this out for yourself so you have a good understanding of it! The human heart is so so special to Jesus. He died to save just one human heart, which happens to be the one you will be holding in your relationship. He has placed an INFINITE worth on that heart, you had better do the same. Don't become complacent to regard them as less than priceless, because Jesus has invested ALL of Himself into their lives, and you are only investing a fraction of your life. Think about that. Jesus owns them and their heart, and He has privileged you to hold the responsibility of upkeep and maintenance. Keep it clean, pure, and holy before Jesus. Hold each other accountable. Their heart's gravity must be recognized before entering a relationship.

These are just a few of the many pieces of advice that one could offer, however, I do not know much of dating/marriage because I have not experienced it! I am just trying to learn as much as I can about it, then share that with yall because it is important! As you learn to love others in dating relationships, engagements, and marriages, remember to always #LiveItLikeJesus, because He knows what He is doing when He loves!