Intimacy. Immediately the word brings with it an almost taboo connotation, but I'm here to clear things up.
Intimacy, over all, is to be close to someone. However, it is not that simple... intimacy is an extremely deep, knowledgable, perspective of someone or something. You know it in and out, front and back, and it would be surprising if you learned something NEW! The reason it takes a lot of people aback is that it is often conjoined with the word 'physical'; and now I've crossed the line because I've started talking about sex. Words are powerful, so we must be careful how we use them!
However, physical intimacy is NOT AT ALL a bad thing! It is BEAUTIFUL (or so I've heard)! The problem lies in the temptation. As humans, we have found a way to defile God's purpose and plan for His creation. Outside of marriage, physical intimacy can ravage and kill spiritual lives. It can ruin families, which is odd; its intention is to BUILD up families! Misused, one of God's most cherished and sacred acts becomes a tool of massive destruction. And its not just sex that I'm talking about. I see it all the time in dating; people who have no idea what intimacy is! Physical intimacy, I would argue, is any physical contact: a high five, a handshake, a hug, a kiss, and finally, sex. Any of these can make people uncomfortable, or even more comfortable. And all of these promote a closeness and unity, to various degrees, with the other party. When we decide to embark on relationships, be it professional, friends, espoused, or married, we need to set LIMITS to how intimate we grow with others.
However, physical intimacy is not the only way to grow close to people! Another part of a relationship is emotional intimacy. And this, when used improperly, can be even MORE destructive than its physical aspect. Emotions rage all day every day (especially, I've noticed, in teens). Overreacting and 'reading between the lines' are both ways a teen's crazy emotions are displayed! Anyways, emotional intimacy is a close knowledge, to the full extent of the word, of another's heart. And just like physical intimacy, it has varying degrees, though these are harder to define. However, a simple prayer request may bare a tiny piece of someone's heart, while a heart-to-heart may bare their entire heart, and even still, marriage can bring to light what they never knew they had in their heart! Wow! See, marriage is the culmination of ALL intimacy - physical, emotional, and spiritual (more on that later) - and you know your partner SO WELL that you two become one. Yall should compliment each other, meaning you guys should push the other onwards to Jesus (not that you two give each other nicities... but men, it is still good to compliment your wife!). And reading between the lines destroys this.
Trying to guess motives is a hard thing to do. Actually, its something I've become guarded against because I've come to realize the power of words on the human soul! After all, God used words to shape the universe, so a lot of power is invested in them! You see, I love to be kind to others. I feel God has put me on this earth as an encourager, and as such, I'll compliment people, ask hard questions of some, and seek answers for others. I'm like a resource others can use, I guess. But I need to be CAREFUL. I know for sure God wants me to be relationship-free right now, and yet, some of my nice actions could be misread. As I become more invested in others, and emotional intimacy grows, I need to remember to place barriers around my heart AND THEIRS so that I am not leading them on. I see so much beauty in a human heart, and I'd HATE it if I broke one. That kills me, to see broken hearts all around! And thats why I strive to encourage those broken! But often the broken are susceptible to misunderstanding. Thats why we guard ourselves. We cannot give all of us away to anyone on the street! Just like physical intimacy, we should save some of our emotional intimacy for our marriage partner alone.
Got sidetracked. Finally, we come to spiritual intimacy. Most people are closed up about this, and thats fine. What you and Jesus do, thats yall's adventure! And oftentimes, I am not in a close enough friendship to warrant my knowledge of their relationship with Jesus. However, and I believe very strongly in this, OUR spiritual journey is for MANY'S edification. Using Jesus's guidance, share your experiences, for He teaches through example. Otherwise, guard your spiritual intimacy... until a relationship matures. Share what you must with peers, share what you can with friends, and share all you know with your married partner. Granted, it shouldn't be in one evening! But you should be willing to bare yourself before God and your spouse, should the moment arise. You two should seek God together; once married, the spiritual intimacy you two share will mesh and pull you BOTH towards Jesus! You will know the Bridegroom even more! Because, as beautiful as marriage is, it is a pitiful METAPHOR for what we have in store with Jesus. Wow. Can't wait for Wedding Day with my Jesus!!!
Intimacy is getting to know someone or something extremely well. Be careful what you share, and what you withhold. Hidden truths that need to be shared can ruin, while truths brought to light can ALSO ruin. Use Jesus as your guide for what you should and shouldn't do! But always always always seek intimacy with Him, for He will never leave or misplace your trust! #LiveItLikeJesus
Sunday, January 18, 2015
Experiencing Closeness
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David God bless. I read it the other day at lunch when you posted it, I must say that it was hard to read and to re-read, because of what I'm going through after not being careful with my heart and emotions, add in physical intimacy and it blew up in my face –though it is not by far the most challenging thing in my life, or my worst mistakes, it does consume my attention right now– I though I could handle it, I was so wrong. I guess on the bright side I was the only one that got hurt. If not for God I couldn't have made it this far, it's been almost two months of emotional instability, depression and pain (though pain, regret and depression have been a part of me for the better part of my life, when emotions get into the mix it really becomes unbearable and confusing) . Sometimes it's hard, because even though I know I shouldn't focus on myself, my pain, my shortcomings, my mistakes, my regrets and there are a lot, etc. it's a conscious effort to not wallow and dwell there. It's only when I focus on God, His love, His firgiveness, His favor, His mercy, His strength, His wisdom, His will, and also when I focus on praying for others that every thing starts to become clearer and with a purpose, with hope. I'm still struggling to keep afloat, and there's a lot of things that need to be changed in my life, I guess my life story is that of what not do, however I know the Lord is my helper, He is the one who has been there for me in the darkest night, even if I loose sight of that truth. Your insight into this overlooked subject by me, has help me to see things from a different perspective. Thanks, it sure motivates me to strive to have a closer relationship with our Lord Jesus Christ. May the Lord keep you David
ReplyDeleteHumberto Silva, no problem. I write what I know God wants me to, and I want to offer you some encouragement today:
ReplyDeleteI have not had the same experiences as you, but I do believe my purpose on this earth is to be an encouragement to others. More behind the scenes, rather than on the front lines. To this end God has had me working; speaking life into my peers' hearts as they DO struggle through similar things to you. First of all, I want you to listen to the song "Broken Together" by Casting Crowns. When you mentioned your life was a list of things not to do, that made me so sad! I empathize well with others, and I think this song will do you good.
Secondly, focusing on Jesus and others is so very important! Keep it up! Don't you stop! You know, when you look to Jesus, you are looking at the Father. Similarly, when the Father looks at Jesus, He is looking at YOU. Jesus has been your intercessor!! He's got you covered… quite literally! You are treasured, adored, valued more than all the riches in the world! You are called Beautiful! Your Bridegroom, Jesus, hangs your photo on His refrigerator and runs around, proclaiming your beauty to the angels, rejoicing for He knows He'll be with you soon!
See, God is all about relationships. The picture I put in your head may seem goofy, and even if God DOESN'T have a fridge, He DOES love you like that! He loves you purely, infinitely, innocently, and FULLY. There is nothing He would hold back! What Father wouldn't give His daughter in law (remember the coming Wedding Day?) what she asks? Do you think that the healing you so desire, emotionally, will be subtracted from His infinite storehouses? He will ALWAYS have more to give! It is INFINITE! Do not hesitate to ask, for He is delighted to give!
Next song you should listen to is "For My Good" by Trip Lee. Great lyrics. And finally, don't you stop embracing your faith! Pursue it to greater and greater ends, and run this race with endurance! For when you fall, He will pick you up! You are His daughter! Run to His arms!
Thanks, these songs do minister, especially "for my good". I guess this latetest No from Jesus, is for my good, even if it hurts too much, but it sure has brought me to my knees and it's opening my eyes and heart to what really matters. Thanks for your words of encouragement to press on in the faith, I sure needed to hear them. God bless David.
ReplyDeleteGod bless you as well!
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